WEYBURN, SK – During these trying times of pandemics and civil unrest, the only certainty that local systems analyst Tyson Russell (25) has come to expect is the absolute worst from his family and peers on his Facebook feed. Despite this, it is rumoured that these expectations have been repudiated by an unlikely source. The author of Russell’s disbelief is none other than local roughneck Lucas Brian (37), who currently has a 2018 Chevrolet Silverado set as his Facebook profile picture.
“It all started when I was scrolling through my Facebook on my phone after work, as I usually do,” said Russell. “That is when I stumbled upon a Black Lives Matter (BLM) related post from Now This! or maybe Buzzfeed, it’s hardly important. What’s relevant here is that I had seen ‘Lucas Brian commented on this’ before the actual post. Now, I like Lucas, but he’s not exactly a diplomatic person. This is especially true when he’s voicing opinions on Facebook. He’s not great at expressing his emotions or a particularly good writer, either. God bless him – he is a good dude, though. He works hard and legit cares about the people around him. When I tapped my phone to see what monstrosity he unleashed upon the world this, my jaw hit the floor.”
Russell had said that when Lucas typically comments or posts, it is usually a string of arguments with strangers based on poorly researched facts and a barrage of insults hurled at his opponents such as “libtard” and “cuck”. Since Lucas’ Facebook comments rarely deviate from these two components, the comment came as a head-scratcher to the Weyburn resident. That is why Russell was flabbergasted when Brian had commented the following:
Everything going on right now seems so out of my grasp. People on all sides aren’t being treated right and suffering because of the turmoil. Protests sometimes need to happen to ignite change but there are so many innocent people in the crossfire that it saddens me to see. Black people have been treated unfairly for a long time now and it is time for that to change. On the other hand, I can’t change the world alone. What I can do is treat people who have had different struggles than me with empathy. All I can do is be a little kinder to people.
At press time, a visibly perplexed Russell evaluated a contradictory meme that Brian had shared on his feed that casually suggested committing war crimes on Justin Trudeau only several minutes after his dexterous comment.