LOS ANGELES, CA – During the year of 2020 Prime Minister Justin Trudeau’s approval ratings have plummeted to an all-time low due to the uncovering of scandals and corruption within his cabinet. In addition to these blunders, recent scrutiny of Mr. Trudeau has revealed that he has now betrayed the trust of the Canadian people and the World Wrestling Entertainment Inc. (WWE) Rules and Regulations in a scandal that is truly revolting.
Sources from Canadian and American intelligence authorities, as well as the WWE, have confirmed today that Mr. Trudeau had just recently won a WWE Championship through ill-gotten means and now refuses to relinquish his belt.
“It’s a total debacle!” added WWE owner and CEO, Vince McMahon.
The scandal in question involves Mr. Trudeau competing with the last remaining contestant, Roman Reigns, for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship at a Money in the Bank ladder match in Los Angeles, CA. After the two contestants exchanged blows for a brief time, Reigns was able to choke slam Mr. Trudeau through a particle-board table, rendering him unconscious and allowing Mr. Reigns the time needed to set-up the ladder and climb for the prize.
Before Mr. Reigns could grab the briefcase containing the WWE World Championship belt and a full-time contract for the 2021 WWE season, eyewitnesses confirm that Mr. Trudeau grabbed Mr. Reigns by the boot and struck him in the back of the head.
While that is a legal move, an outcry of boos and jeers could be heard throughout the Staples Center as it was evident that Mr. Trudeau had concealed a roll of pennies in his pants pocket and was waiting for an opportunity to strike Mr. Reigns with it. Total pandemonium broke out in the stadium when Mr. Trudeau clutched the briefcase and belt at the top of the ladder while Roman Reigns lay motionless on the ring floor.
“Mr. Trudeau has won his prize fair-and-square,” said Cameron Ahmad, Mr. Trudeau’s Communication Director. “All of the other contestants were either carrying penny-rolls or were waiting for the right time to distract the ref and use chairs. It may not be morally right, but it is how the game is played. Had Mr. Trudeau not used some dirty tricks, another contestant would have.”
In response to the scandal and the fact that Mr. Trudeau will not relinquish his belt, foreign ministers have decided to intervene. Boris Johnson, Jean Castex, Donald Trump, Xi Jinping, and Vladimir Putin will be meeting Mr. Trudeau in New York, NY at the Madison Square Garden on August 21, 2020 at 8:00 p.m. EST to determine to rightful owner of the WWE World Heavyweight Championship via a no-holds-barred Hell in a Cell Royal Rumble.