DAVIDSON, SK – Local Sask Highway worker and self-proclaimed stoner, Brock Fielder (25), has announced his plans to get “high as balls” today despite the fact that he does so every Tuesday, and every other day, for that matter.
Fielder is just one of many around the world who celebrates 4/20, an unofficial holiday in the cannabis community held on April 20 each year.
“Dude, 4/20 only comes around once per year and it is the best! I’m so excited to finally be able to get stoned,” said Fielder, who is frequently stoned while working with the highways or helping out with his father’s farm.
A visibly excited Fielder told The Pot Hole News that he will be beginning the festivities at 4:20 p.m. today, in which he will be ingesting copious amounts of weed, listening to music, watching cartoons, and eating a variety of candies and junk food. Mr. Fielder seemed completely unaware that his party plans are exactly how he spends most week nights.
“I’m not sure what he’s so excited about,” said a co-worker of Fielder’s. “That dude is never not stoned. It’d be like if I were to throw a celebration for breathing.”
Mr. Fielder seems undeterred by the criticism, however, and extends a welcome to anyone who wants to join.
“Bruh, if you’re tryna smoke my place is the place to be. COVID won’t stand a chance against the shit I got, man. I’ll even let you hit off the bong,” said Fielder, pointing to what was once a clear glass bong, now black and brown from five years of heavy usage and never being cleaned once.
As of press time, The Pot Hole News returned to Fielder’s residence at 7:00 p.m. to see how the 4/20 party was coming along, and had found Mr. Fielder asleep on his couch and his laptop open displaying Pornhub.